Grieving Wall
(Posted 12/11\21) Grieving has been a long process for me even as a child at the age of 12 when my dad died. All my life I've suppressed my feelings inside from losing relatives who were very close to my heart and I love dearly. Living life thus far has been like a navigation system that I still feel lost and alone trying to make it through without them. Sometimes I find myself shedding tears from memories of good times I shared with those loved ones and how much i still miss them and wish they were here. 09/28/2015 was by far the worst day of my life because my aunt/mom who raised me went home to be with the Lord. Ever since then my heart even though full of love... Has been very cold and has made me step my game up more in life as a person and mother because now all I have is me...God...and my kids. Even though I have few select people that I vent to from time to time... Its not the same as being able to talk to her because she was my bestfriend and my world. Holidays have never been the same without her and I pray to God daily to help me overcome this pain I constantly feel inside but I smile on the inside still changing lives of those who cross my path. It hasnt been an easy road yet I thank God for bringing me thus far in my life.
(Posted 11/28/2021) Who would have thought on 10/2/2021 my Superman my dad would leave me. This was the worst day of my life! I can still hear his voice as clear as day. If I could bring him back for just a few seconds I would shower him with hugs and kisses and tell him again how much I love him. I would also tell him how great of a father he is and thank him for my upbringing. As the days pass by it gets just a little easier but some days I am so filled with grief. I just want my daddy back. The Lord won’t give you more than you can bare, but Lord I wish you didn’t trust me so much. I love my dad but I know the Lord loves him more and I find comfort in knowing dad is safe and resting peacefully. I love you dad 🕊
(Posted 11/16/21) I hope this helps somebody, especially men. I love being an AEDP therapist because I see it as a healing model with predictable results. Over and over again, I have witnessed my patients process emotions and heal from their traumas. They recover their true self. A key part of this process involves acknowledging losses and mourning. Tears poured down his face as one hand covered his eyes in embarrassment. “I hate crying,” he said. Feeling deep love and admiration for this man, I gently whispered, “Your sadness is beautiful. It comes from your strength. This is your love… for yourself… and it’s good to let it come.”
(Posted 11/15/2021) Pain can last a lifetime and can be dormant until triggered by a memory, music or holidays. It reminds me of that person who’s laugh I’ll never hear or smile I’ll never see. The things I should’ve said or calls to check on them I could’ve made. I have grief that hasn’t surfaced or healed because of anger that’s keeping it buried.
(Posted 11/14/21) Who would have thought that two of my siblings, two other close relatives, and multiple friends would be dead! All in less than a year!! The deaths felt different than those before the pandemic. My heart ached constantly. I was devastated, angry, just felt defeated. I’m usually a strong person, but I felt powerless to find any comfort or to comfort others. Slowly I’m finding some normalcy and regaining purpose in my life. Life goes on! With my faith in God, I am moving forward.
Posted (11/9/2021) Thank you for this. All I could do is cry the night my mother passed, and I am still grieving😢 We are human and we all hurt no matter who we are”. I trust God even through this pain that feels unbearable and unfair. I feel like I need her here with me to get thru a lot of life decisions 😢😢😢😢. One day at a time, matter of fact One minute at a time. ❤️❤️
