Activity 18.2
Avoiding confrontation
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Notice how each of the examples below uses one or more technique for reassuring the speaker that you are asking out of a desire to understand, not trap them in a logical, moral, or factual error.
For each example, indicate the technique(s) used:
1. Adding “you” to communicate that you want to hear their thoughts.
2. Linking the question to specifics the speaker has shared before.
3. Linking the question back to you and your desire to learn more.
"I hear that you care about <the issue.> Can you help me understand what matters most to you about it?"
"Who do you see as being negatively impacted by <the current situation>?"
"You mentioned <group or term they mentioned.>  Can you be more specific?  Who/what are your referring to?"
"What do you think is at stake here?"
"Why is <the issue> important to you now, at this time?"
"I get the sense that you have some personal experiences with <the issue>. Can you tell me more about that?"
"I’m curious. Do you personally know anyone who would be impacted by <the issue>?"
"Do you have any thoughts about why your perspective on <the issue> is different from mine?"
"Do you think being <older, younger, a boomer, a millennial> gives you a different perspective?"
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