When people talk about harmful stress — the kind that can affect health — they usually point to big, life-changing events, such as the death of a loved one. They don't usually talk about flight delays, traffic jams and cellphones that run out of battery during an important call. But a growing body of research suggests that minor, everyday stress can harm health, too, and even shorten life spans.

One traffic jam a week isn't going to kill you, of course. Psychologists say it's the nonstop strains of everyday life that can add up. "These hassles can have a big impact on physical health and well-being, particularly when they accumulate and we don't have time to recover from one problem before another hits us," said psychologist and writer Melanie Greenberg.

Health Risks
Persistent daily hassles can lead to increased blood pressure. That puts you at risk for heart disease, explained Carolyn Aldwin, director of the Center for Healthy Aging Research at Oregon State University. She added that they can also raise the levels of our stress hormones, a process that affects our immune system. Ongoing stress can also lead to inflammation, a condition associated with a host of serious illnesses, including cancer.

It's not necessarily the exposure to the continuous streams of minor stressors, but how we react that can take a toll. In a 2016 study, researchers interviewed about 900 people about the frequency with which they experienced stress and had them evaluate the severity of it. They also tested their resting heart rate variability, or HRV, the variation in intervals between heartbeats. A higher HRV is associated with a healthy response to stress. A lower one has been associated with increased risk of heart disease and death.

The researchers found that it wasn't the number of stressful events that had the greatest impact on a person's health. Rather, it was how a person perceived their stress and then reacted to it emotionally that was associated with lower HRV.

Emotional Responses
In a 2014 study of 1,300 men, Aldwin and other researchers had participants rank on a stress scale the situations they encountered during the course of a day. The list included such items as "your kids," "your garden" and "your commute to work." The researchers found that men who perceived their everyday hassles as very stressful were more likely to be in poorer health. These men had a similar mortality risk as people who consistently reported more highly stressful life events, such as the death of a loved one.

"Men who rated daily lives as 'extremely' stressful were three times more likely to die during the study than those who reported low levels of daily stress," Aldwin said. Learning to roll with the punches, she said, can protect you.

While it's normal to lose one's cool from time to time, some people may be hard-wired to overreact. "People who are higher in neuroticism, meaning those who have strong emotions that are easily aroused, are much more likely to get upset over minor problems," Aldwin said. Research suggests that people who are naturally more neurotic tend to have a more reactive physical response to perceived threats, such as an increased heart rate. They can take longer to calm down, which makes it much harder to regulate emotions.

Sometimes, overblown reactions — such as throwing a tantrum over a train delay — are a matter of context. "Being late to work may not be a major thing unless your boss has gotten mad at you for being late too much," Aldwin said.

Sweating The Small Stuff
Greenberg added that being worn down by stress can also make us more vulnerable to day-to-day irritations that can cause us to overreact. When we're always stressed and on high-alert, Greenberg said, "our fight, flight or freeze response never turns off." As a result, "we get a buildup of cortisol in our bodies, and that makes us vulnerable to diseases."

Even for people inclined to sweat the small stuff, there are strategies to help regulate emotions. Psychotherapist Amy Morin advises her patients to notice physical symptoms that indicate stress levels are rising. "People say they go from zero to 10, but when you really pay attention, there are some warning signs," she said. These include clenched fists, a flushed face or a racing heart. Recognizing and then managing your bodily response, by excusing yourself from the situation or taking some deep breaths, can stop an angry escalation before it really gets going, she said.

Keeping It In Perspective
Another way to deal with annoyances, Morin said, is to view them through a fact-based lens. For example, reminding yourself that there are millions of cars on the road can help you realize that traffic jams are inevitable, not personal. "Instead of wishing the situation were different or insisting the circumstances are unfair, focus on your reaction," Morin said.

While you can't control the speed of traffic, she explained, you can control what you do while you're in your car. You can decide, for example, to listen to music or tune in to your favorite podcast. Morin said thinking about the facts and refocusing your attention can reduce the intensity of negative emotions and help you accept that annoyances are just a normal part of life.

To help keep daily hassles in perspective, Aldwin offered this advice: "When you feel your stress levels rising, ask yourself: Is this really worth getting so upset over that I'm willing to harm my health?"

Chances are, it's not.