Andrew hadn’t been performing well in his job for a while. His manager raised concerns, and cited many examples of where Andrew had failed to prepare activities for colleagues and so they could not take place. Andrew threatened to resign, but the team proposed a meeting with the manager and another colleague as mediator. At the start of the meeting, the mediator asked each person to say their goals for the meeting. Andrew said he wanted to reach a “shared understanding”. When the mediator asked him what that would mean for him, he said “to defend himself and convince the manager that he was not at fault”.