Emotionally intelligent couples are intimately familiar with each other's world.  John M. Gottman, psychological researcher and clinician, calls this having a richly detailed "Love Map" - a part of your brain where you store all the relevant information about your partner's life. Without such a Love Map, you can't really know your partner. Couples who have detailed Love Maps of each other's world are far better prepared to cope with stressful events and conflicts.

In the questionnaire below, please give your honest answers, and you will get a sense of the quality of your own current Love Maps. It would be better if both partners complete this Love Map assessment.

After answering these questions, you will receive the scores to your email address.

If you receive 10 or above: This is an area of strength for your marriage/partnership. You have a fairly detailed map of your partner's everyday life, hopes, fears, and dreams. You know what makes your spouse "tick." Based on your score you'll probably find the love map exercises that follow easy and gratifying. They will serve as a reminder of how connected you and your partner are. Try not to take for granted this knowledge and understanding of each other. Keeping in touch in this way ensures you'll be well equipped to handle any problem areas that crop up in your relationship,

If  you your score is below 10: Your marriage could stand some improvement in this area. Perhaps you never had the time or the tools to really get to know each other. Or perhaps your love maps have become outdated as your lives have changed over the years. In either case, by taking the time to learn more about your partner now, you'll find your relationship becomes stronger.