Attendance 2.0: A virtual cyber augmented cloud survey about remote attendance at sociolinguistic events

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BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE AT THE SOCIOLINGUISTIC EVENTS CALENDAR: https://www.baal.org.uk/slxevents

Academic Twitter has recently been all aflutter about remote attendance at conferences, which is apparently possible using The Internets.

The Internets have so far been used mostly to share amusing pictures of cats, but some brainy eggheads have realised you can also talk into it, and be seen and heard at the other end. Holy transfer protocols, Batman! You don’t even have to leave your house, or your pyjamas.

Using these magic tubes for an entire conference is a bit more complicated, but it has been done. The software is out there, e.g. Adobe Connect, Zoom, Google Hangouts. Search for these and delight in a load of swishy corporate promo videos that may not really explain much. But the point is, you can have a conference where everyone plugs in remotely.

That’s a lot less travel than if you actually packed your bags, hauled over to the airport and spewed pollutants all the way to your destination. So, less pollution and more pyjamas. What’s not to like? Well, according to question 4 of our very first survey in 2015 (https://academia.edu/14266444), a lot! Although 66.7% of respondents thought remote attendance should be allowed in exceptional circumstances, a curmudgeonly 94.9% did not want it to be routinely available. (The remaining 5.1% really, really like their PJs.)

But have times changed since 2015? Nowadays we’re all feeling evermore desperately guilty about our hoofing carbon footprints. Let’s get into some detail and see if the sociolinguists of the world would put their abstract where their mouth is, and go remote…

(GDPR DATA PROTECTION STUFF: 1. Your responses will be locked up safely on Google Drive and definitely not sold to Facebook, Cambridge Analytica, or a lucrative list of spammers hoping to sell you virtual cyber weight loss or something. 2. Nobody but the calendar moderators will see what you write, but if you write something really funny we might quote you (anonymously) in the survey write-up. 3. We'll probably forget to ever delete the survey responses fully, but if you ask us nicely to delete any identifiable stuff you wrote, we'll certainly look into it.)

1. First, some context for comparison. Compared to 2015, nowadays for conference travel would you be more likely to… *

If possible take a train/bus instead of fly, as long as it took the same number of days? 🚂

If possible take a train/bus even if it took one extra day? 🚂😴🚂

If possible take a train/bus even if it took two extra days? 🚂😴🚂😴🚂

Significantly cut down your overseas conferences? (Statistical significance if you please.) ✈️🙈

Print stuff less? 🖨🙈

Eat less meat? 🍗🙈

Give up that super fun flamethrower hobby? 🔥🙈

Militate to overthrow the polluting corporate overlords? ✊

Required

2. The biggest items in most conference budgets are usually room hire, catering, and plenary expenses. If the entire conference is online, those disappear. Ditto security, cleaning, conference packs – actually, pretty much everything! IT support would be higher than normal, but still probably offset by those big juicy savings elsewhere. Same with all your own travel costs. So, how much cheaper would registration have to be for an online conference to score your business? *

25% cheaper 💰

50% cheaper 💰💰

75% cheaper 💰💰💰

FREE 💰💰💰💰

3. Did you know that the Sociolinguistic Events Calendar (https://baal.org.uk/slxevents) is already entirely online, AND free, AND you’re allowed to use it in your pyjamas? *

EHRMAGERRD that’s AMAZEBALLS!!!!11!!!1!!

I don’t usually evangelise about calendars, but when I do, it’s the Sociolinguistic Events Calendar.

Hold my calendar.

Other:

4. What do you feel would be the biggest downside to an online-only conference? *

Not being able to tell my absolute favourite joke which is totally funny over and over again at the conference dinner.

Missing out on chummy chit-chat in the breaks when I can finally catch up with my old PhD buddies and we can compare wrinkles… I mean have productive discussions about, er, new research and stuff, funding bids, yeah.

Poor quality video and/or people angling their webcam so it basically just points straight up their nose, I mean seriously.

Not being able to schmooze with big cheeses and rub shoulders with them until I gain status by osmosis or something because that's how it works right?

Other:

5. What would be your main reason for doing something as excitingly modern and environmentally magnificent as participate in an online-only conference? *

I could attend more of them, which would help me hear about new research and pretend I know what on earth is going on in my field.

It would give me all sorts of new opportunities to talk about me and my work! Me, me, me!

It would give me an immensely smug sense of moral superiority about saving the planet.

Other:

6. Would you be comfortable presenting at an online-only conference if your talk was… *

Live-streamed ONLY to those who registered for the event.

Live-streamed to ALL THE INTERNETS.

Live-streamed AND recorded for access afterwards, but ONLY for those who registered for the event.

Live-streamed AND recorded for access afterwards, for EVERYONE in the whole wide world wide interwebs.

Broadcast with lasers on to the face of the moon.

7. The survey is over?! But I was enjoying myself so much... *

Other:

Last but not least, the Sociolinguistic Events Calendar is hiring! We need someone to join our crack team of volunteers. It typically takes less than 15 minutes per week and you would be part of the internet's most prestigious online calendar of sociolinguistic events! Seriously, Google 'sociolinguistic events' - we're number 1! AND number 2!! Just put your *name and email* below and we'll get back to you! Or if you can't become a volunteer, you can just share your happiest thought about us and this survey.😊

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