(1)I have a relative who never throws anything away. (2)This woman (in the interests of protecting her privacy, I won’t tell you who she is. (3)Just let me say that I’ve known her forever and she shares a bedroom with my father) has a stack of Reader’s Digest magazines five feet high. (4)“Someday I’m going to take all the ‘It Pays To Increase Your Word Power’ quizzes,” she says when I suggest it’s time to say goodbye to issues from, oh, say, 1974 to 1987. (5)In her garage are roughly four million cardboard tubes from rolls of toilet paper and paper towels. (6)“They’re so useful for children’s art projects,” she says, ignoring the fact that her children are all in their mid-twenties. (7)Her kitchen cupboards are jammed with little aluminum foil pans from chicken pot pies. (8)“I could make individual lemon-meringue pies for a special dessert,” she says. (9)“You’ve been saying that for fifteen years,” I say. (10)“Well, someday I’m going to,” she answers. (11)“Just as soon as I’ve gotten through all those ‘Word Power’ quizzes.”